Where have I been? I am not sure, as I have not felt myself in some time. Financial worries, job worries, and a bout of anxiety every day has taken hold of me these past few months and I am tired of it. I still have no teaching job so spent most of the summer trying to pump up my ebay store. E-bay for many is slow during the month of June and part of July... for me, it got to the point that I needed something part time to keep us afloat so I started working as a server 2 days a week. I work double shifts on these 2 days and with getting home late then getting Alex up and ready for school, my sleep schedule is all over the place, another player in not having much motivation to keep listing items on ebay lately. By the time I package and ship out the items I sell, I do not want to deal with listing.
Part of my problem is that I have no stamina. I have been totally lacking a good exercise routine since spring, so yesterday I went to a sporting goods store and bought a new bike. Everyone in my house has a bike, so why shouldn't mommy?? Sure, I enjoy jogging on my treadmill from time to time, but it can get soooooooooo boring!! Plus, I need some sort of goal that is not weight related to get back in shape. I am so tired of dieting and thinking of my weight all the time, I just want to feel good and have energy! I hate running outside, my side always starts hurting, then my ears start hurting, and I just cannot get past the first 3 days before quitting. Yeah, I know, I am supposed to work through that initial pain, but it never seems worth it to me.
Now, don't get me wrong...I only lasted 20 minutes on my new bike yesterday before I decided I might pass out. Yes, I am THAT out of shape! And because Damien and I have total opposite work schedules, I don't have much time for big rides any time soon since I am usually with both kids at home. So today I will clean, pay bills, list a little on ebay, play with the kids, and hopefully with the time I have left over (if there is any time left over!), I can start doing some research on biking.
I better go get this day started since I am now on my last drink of coffee! Hoping Damien gets home before dark so I can go for a ride (maybe I will last 21 minutes today!).